Shoot for the Moon; Land among the Stars

Have you ever wanted something so badly you could taste it? Something that seemed so out of your reach that no matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t do it?

Did that stop you from trying?

I know the likelihood of me being a successful author is low, with so many authors being already out there and amazing at what they do. Everyone is so prolific now, and self-publishing has made writing easier to distribute. Book prices range from a dollar to fifteen, but you damn well better have the last name of King before you can command those higher prices.

The market is saturated, it’s beyond saturated, it’s Houston in Hurricane Harvey saturated, and not even rafts of fire ants to be seen.

And yet.

There is a fire inside of me. It began when I was young. I wrote constantly. There was never a time that I didn’t have a notebook and pen with me. (Okay, maybe when I was riding my bike. Maybe dinner. You get it.) I won awards, although they were little kid awards, meant to bolster that tender self-esteem necessary to ford the slings and arrows of later unsolicited feedback.

I thought it had died. I spent so long not writing, or maybe typing up a page or two before giving up and going back to life, which at the time was so much more interesting, and so much better than applying ass to seat.

I was surprised when it roared back to life. Being laid off and having a two-year-old child left me with time on my hands but being mostly housebound. I wrote two books, one that would later be published and one that may never be. I was hooked, I had to keep going.

Now here I am, years later, and my storytelling style has gone through a complete renovation. I outline. I forecast word count. I write two books at the same time because alternating stories means less mental fatigue. I can estimate where a book is going to end, and if it’s not going to hit the submission requirements, I can take steps to fix it. I submitted to an online ‘zine on a whim. I have short stories on standby if my friend wants to publish them. (Edit: Except she took them all, and now I must write more. Yay Hot Mess 3!)

So, if anyone tells you that your dream isn’t worth chasing, my expert advice is to tell them to Fuck Right Off. Even if you don’t make it all the way, the things you learn in your pursuit are worthy, and can change your life.

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Summer Summary

This summer has been a roller coaster, for real. The first month was all grandparent visits, which both were fantastic but energy-intensive as all visits are. There was a short span of time where things were routine. My son went to the Boys and Girls club, we had two vehicles, and I went out on visits with my friends. My anniversary to my husband rolled around, and we spent a glorious weekend doing house chores and going to movies.

It turned out to be a good decision to do one particular chore. We put heat film on the windows to make our room cooler. We’re on the second floor, and so adding this film cut the heat. This was an absolute godsend, because two weeks later came a heatwave in the PacNW that has coincided with wildfire season.

The heat wave also coincided with the death of my valiant steed, the Subaru. I drove that vehicle for twelve years, so losing it was a shock to the system. I mean, you’re not just losing a car at that point, you’re losing a family pet. My son’s reaction reflected my own. My husband was disappointed not to have two cars anymore, but didn’t see the value in fixing our old car. There are a lot of details to manage when a vehicle dies. We sold it for salvage, had to find the title, and yadda yadda yadda. It will be a while before we go to purchase a second vehicle. Possibly until I graduate.

This has nothing to do with writing, which is pretty much one hundred percent accurate. With so much going on, I haven’t had much time to write this summer. I have started on the third novel in my trilogy, but it is the first draft, and I’m not even 20% of the way in yet. So, nothing close to done. I believed I could churn out a draft “with all that spare time” I would get in the summer. Alas, life doesn’t work that way sometimes.

However, I am glad that I didn’t have classes this summer. With everything that happened, it would be difficult to balance classes and visitors and car death. And the summer hasn’t been a long string of bad things. Our visitors and our trip both were awesome. I wouldn’t have a working vehicle right now if my parents hadn’t visited and gifted us Mom’s Impala. Things have been working out beautifully. They’ve been keeping me quite busy.

Summer is winding down. The Boys & Girls’ club will be closing down after this week, we need to buy school clothes, and we’re ramping up to doing homework so my son isn’t clubbed over the head with it when school starts. I will be sorry to see it go, but it will nice to have routine back in the house again.